Top 10 Affair Dating Sites for Married People Seeking Discreet Fun

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  • DatingforLove
  • Feb 21, 2024

Thanks to the rise of online dating, married people face more temptation than ever before, and there are a lot of gray areas when mingling on an affair dating site or app. Where do you draw the line between harmless flirtation and actually having an affair? Is signing up for a dating site or app a transgression? Does chatting necessarily mean cheating? Some couples say yes, while others may not see it that way.

Popular dating sites and apps for married people, by their very nature, appeal to people who are looking for fun times and meaningful connections, and not everyone in that audience is necessarily totally single. A good number of married individuals have succumbed to their curiosity and explored date options from the privacy of their smartphones or computers.

The online dating world may cater primarily to singles, but they aren’t the only ones looking for connections and hoping to find excitement in their daily lives. A growing number of people have pursued secret affairs on a dating site or app. Over 60% of online daters in one survey reported being in a relationship. A separate study on Tinder found that an estimated 40% of its users are already married or have a boyfriend or girlfriend, yet they actively use the app to seek dates.

1. AshleyMadison

Ashley Madison is a discreet dating site and app where married men and women can pursue casual sex and relationships without judgment. More than 54 million members have joined the network since its launch in 2002.

Ashley Madison is probably most well-known as an app for cheaters, but that’s not all it’s good for. Yes, it can facilitate illicit affairs and married dating, but its chats can also lead to deep conversations or platonic friendships, and its swiping game can offer a welcome distraction from married life.

About 60% of Ashley Madison users say they’re looking for casual sex, and 44% of men and 39% of women on the site say they have already had an extramarital affair. Over the last decade, the website has enhanced its privacy tools, including a photo blurring feature, to ensure married folks have the freedom and peace of mind to follow their desires.

2. AdultFriendFinder

Adult Friend Finder proudly maintains the world’s largest sex and swinger community. The sex site promises a judgment-free space where any adult single, couple, or non-monogamous group can let their freak flag fly.

The AFF community has seen over 104 million members join the site since 1997, and it boasts making millions of new connections each day.

As a popular hookup website, Adult Friend Finder can help individuals find an affair partner or enjoy a sexual encounter from the privacy of home. It doesn’t require users to download anything or pay anything to get started with a basic membership. That means your secret affair on AFF won’t appear on your smartphone or bank statements. AFF is a poly-friendly site, so don’t be surprised if a few swingers and cheaters come your way. You could get tips about how to have a successful open relationship, and you can satisfy your desire for an extramarital affair by sexting strangers, watching strip teases, and reading erotic stories.

3. HeatedAffairs

HeatedAffairs cranks up the heat in the online dating world and liberates sex seekers of all stripes. With over 48 million members, HeatedAffairs has claimed its spot among the most popular affair dating sites in the world — and it’s still growing.

Thousands of new members create a dating account on Heated Affairs every day. It’s a free and fun way to meet people outside your social circle and professional network.

Whether you’re looking for a new friend or a cheating partner, you can use HeatedAffairs as your go-to late-night wingman. Its free search filters provide instant access to attractive dates, and it keeps your match list within a certain mile radius so users don’t have to travel far to find hot sex.

4. VictoriaMilan

The Victoria Milan website invites married people to “find their secret passion” by creating a free and anonymous dating profile. Members can also download the Victoria Milan app on Google Play or the App Store to keep up with their matches while on the go.

As a free member on Victoria Milan, you have the ability to swipe and match in real time with local daters. We’d recommend going into your settings to adjust your date preferences and make sure the dating service meets your romantic standards.

Victoria Milan’s cheating network has more than 6 million members worldwide. The dating platform is particularly popular in North America, but it is also available in Europe, Latin America, and Asia.

5. Tinder

Unless you’ve been living under a married rock for the last 10 years, you’ve probably heard of Tinder. It’s the most popular dating app for 20-somethings and 30-somethings, and it is responsible for arranging over 1.5 million dates per week.

Tinder welcomes singles of all ages, orientations, and backgrounds, and you’ll even find some users who are married or in a relationship. A research firm called the GlobalWebIndex (GWI) estimated that 30% of Tinder users are married and 12% are in a committed relationship. Those numbers seem awfully high to us, but it underscores just how common cheating on Tinder is.

Tinder’s popularity makes it a dangerous space for anyone dating under the radar. A hush affair may not stay secret for long if you maintain an active Tinder profile. Buster Smith warns cheaters, “All it takes is one person to see your profile and bring it to the attention of your significant other.”

6. FriendFinder-X

FriendFinder-X prides itself on being a discreet affair site where “good girls do bad things.” That includes straying from a relationship and having a sexually charged extramarital affair.

The FriendFinder-X team explains, “Our site caters to single, not so single, and open couples looking for casual fun with no long-term commitment. is the place to be for average people looking to spice things up, without changing their current lifestyle.”

With a FriendFinder-X dating profile, you can explore local hotties and engage in flirtatious chats without revealing your true identity. If someone special catches your eye, you can always take things to the next level by sending that man or woman pictures, exchanging phone numbers, or arranging a casual encounter. You never know who you’ll meet or what will happen on FriendFinder-X, and that’s part of the fun.

7. IllicitEncounters

As you can probably tell from the name, IllicitEncounters is an affair website where secrecy is part of the package deal. Since 2003, the niche site has seen over 1.4 million signups, and every member has been screened for authenticity.

IllicitEncounters is a U.K. dating site that currently only allows members from the United Kingdom or the Republic of Ireland.

“The secret to our success is the simplicity of it,” the IllicitEncounters team told us. No fancy algorithms. No bells and whistles. Just a safe space to look for like-minded individuals.”

8. Gleeden

Gleeden is an extramarital dating site created by women for women. It currently has over 7 million members (both men and women) in its married dating network. The private messaging works on a credits-based system. No mutual matches. No mixed signals. Just straightforward chatting.

The Gleeden site started in France, and now it has expanded around the world. For better or worse, the flirtatious conversations and romantic overtures satisfy a deeper need within some married folks. And they have overwhelmingly positive things to say about the married dating service.

“I’ve been on Gleeden for quite a while now, and I’ve never been disappointed,” said a 46-year-old man. “These encounters are full of tenderness, happiness, and simplicity. I wish I could have this in my relationship.”

9. Zoosk

As a social networking and dating website, Zoosk has over 40 million users in its global database, and many of them are serious about picking up dates.

The Zoosk Carousel is the best place to get your swiping game on and view compatible dating profiles one at a time. As you like and message other users, the Zoosk match algorithm will learn what you like and dislike, and it will suggest matches accordingly. This behavioral matchmaking system can lead to a casual encounter or a serious relationship depending on how you play it.

If you’re a married man or woman seeking a potential partner, Zoosk can meet your casual dating needs. This online dating platform has a lot of communication features to play around with, and free members can read and send replies to some greetings, but they have to upgrade to a monthly plan to get full access to the messages in their inboxes.

10. MarriedSecrets

MarriedSecrets offers a discreet dating service for married men, women, and couples who want to flirt without any labels or stigma. The free registration and straightforward matching help new and promising relationships blossom online.

MarriedSecrets has a long history of success to back its matchmaking features. This married dating site has been in the online dating industry for almost 20 years, and it has sheltered many daters hoping to avoid their husband or wife while searching for a romantic tryst.

“I met my match back in June 2007, and I want you to know that this site has allowed me more happiness than you could ever imagine,” said a MarriedSecrets user in a review. “I just want to write to thank you for such a great service.”

11. MaritalAffair

Marital Affair was launched in 2006 under the motto “Explore your curiosity.” So don’t be too surprised if you get some naughty inquiries and enjoy steamy conversations here. This cheating website has nearly 1 million users, and they don’t tend to be very shy or innocent. In fact, some Marital Affair members are downright naughty!

Adults can use Marital Affair to sate their curiosity about the local dating scene in the U.S., the U.K, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, and South Africa.

While Marital Affair fosters sexual freedom, it’s not an online dating free-for-all where a female user can play catfishing games or a male user can send a dick pic. All profiles on Marital Affair must meet certain standards, and users are held accountable for their behavior online.

How Do the Best Affair Dating Sites Actually Work?

Affair dating sites may seem thrilling on the outside, but they haven’t exactly reinvented the online dating wheel. You’ll find the same swiping features on Ashley Madison as you will on other online dating apps. The main difference is in the type of people you meet and the level of anonymity you can expect.

A serial cheater typically values anonymity and goes online to live out a fantasy in private. So the last thing a married person wants is to link a dating profile with an existing Facebook profile. The online dating registration process will have some form of identity verification process, but many dating apps work without Facebook to make sure online dating isn’t a social activity.

Despite what you may think, not everyone joins an affair site to cheat. Some just want to chat (maybe sext), build their self-esteem, and distract themselves from an unsatisfying home life or sexless marriage.

Are Affair Dating Sites Really Safe to Use?

Yes, meeting a stranger on an affair dating site is arguably safer than meeting a stranger at a nightclub or bar because you have more control over your surroundings and matches. Some dating platforms (Tinder, Bumble, etc.) don’t even allow a person to message you unless you OK that profile first.

Just use your best judgment when vetting a potential date and watch out for dating profile lies and inconsistencies that could indicate trouble to come. If you meet an unsavory character, you can block or report that person to keep yourself safe.

Affair sites often give users the option to blur their faces in photos or not include photos at all when looking for matches. The platforms may feature private photo albums or extra layers of security to give cheating daters greater peace of mind.

Affair Dating Sites Offer a Safe Space to View Your Options

It’s natural to feel restless or wonder what’s out there. To some, an affair can seem like an easy way to escape a rut or a bad relationship. The best free affair dating apps and sites can give you the chance to scratch that itch and meet an attractive man or woman who could tempt you to cheat… or remind you why you fell in love with your spouse in the first place.

Sometimes a married person finds that a secret jaunt on a dating site can help them gain clarity on what they want, and it could actually strengthen their commitment to their marriage. Or a cheater could find love in someone else’s arms and get divorced so they can turn that secret affair into a serious relationship.

This journey is about you and what you need to find happiness. An affair dating website or app can lay out some potential match options, and then it’s up to you to decide how far you’re willing to go and what romantic scenarios you can live with. Choose wisely!